PAD 11 - Control

For today’s prompt, write a control poem. That is, write about having control, losing control, or sharing control with others. Of course, I expect at least one person to mention the control key on keyboards. And well, y’all always surprise me, because I can’t control which direction everyone is going to go with this prompt.

Control

I suppose

deep therapy would try

to elicit from me

rage, RAGE - let it go

a primal scream 

(didn't I try that then too?)

self-forgiveness

rage

a primal scream

compassionate distance

self-forgiveness

rage

a primal scream

self-love

compassionate distance

self-forgiveness

rage

a primal scream

So what?

Were you not still grey like dead

in the bathtub

in the hallway

by the side of the house

on top of the wild shards of glass

then

dead like dead

afloat for a day,

sinking for a day,

afloat for a day,

sinking for a day

Is that news to me

that I had no control?

Is that news to me

that I am damaged

and have a right to be angry?

I don't want to scream.
I don't want to rage.

I want to sit in the garden now

and, finally, learn guitar.

Or just watch my fish

who control nothing

and can just be

underwater 

forever.